Before I get into the meat of this post, I want to reiterate that this whole site should only be accessed by those over the age of 18.

If you haven’t given my YouTube content a watch, I recommend doing so (click here). If you prefer reading your information, then keep reading.

First of all, no matter what you intend to do in the industry – financial domination, adult content, spicy audio – understand that it all would technically fall under the umbrella of sex work. Even if you never show your body, earning money from providing sexual gratification to others directly or indirectly is sex work. Know and understand and accept that before getting into this.

Be absolutely certain that you want to do this because it will affect your life in some way. It can affect your relationships – with friends, family, or a partner – and it can really bite you in the butt if word gets out to the wrong people.

If you are not all in, if you have a negative attitude, if you’re only doing this because you’re desperate, you will fail. It sucks, but that’s the truth.

Now that I’ve gotten that out of the way…

Persona

Your persona is key to figuring out your name, your content, and so much more. Persona is going to dictate how you interact with fans and customers, how you post on social media. Are you going to be a Domme? A slut? Are you a switch who makes a variety of content?

If you want to be a Domme, are you interested in being a sadistic Domme (like me), a Mommy Domme, a soft Domme, a brat, a princess, a bully? There are a million and one options, but my recommendation is to pick a path and stick with it. Offering the bully aspect and then saying that you can be soft and encouraging may only confuse potential subs – at least in the beginning.

I find it helps to write out a plan. Write the traits you want to exhibit as a Domme, ideas for content – whether it’s photos or videos. Hell, even write out some ideas for posting on Twitter or other social media.

Make a plan for who you will be online.

Name

This sort of goes along with persona, but this is where you decide what you’ll be called. I know some performers will use their real middle name and a made up last name. Some will even use their real first name. The only people I know who do that are cis men and I while I wouldn’t recommend it for them, I certainly wouldn’t recommend it for anyone who isn’t a cis man. It gives you a higher likelihood of getting doxxed (exposed).

So, once you have your persona, figure out that name. My Domme persona was intended to be powerful, demanding, mean. A Goddess requires tribute and sacrifice so I became a Goddess. I have no idea where the name Sara came from, but it just sort of fit.

When I started adding a last name to my content, some time in 2021, Sitwell made perfect sense. I didn’t think too hard about it. It just came to me. But I could not have chosen better because it works for both sides of my brand – the slut and the Domme.

Of course, don’t think too hard. Don’t give yourself analysis paralysis. Look up baby names, find words associated with power, use the persona you chose. It’ll come to you and you can always rebrand.

Checking Availability

Once you have a name picked out, before you sign up for a social media or spicy account, do some digging. Check to see if anyone has already used that name or something that might be too similar for you to differentiate yourself.

For example, about 6 months or so after I started as bbwgoddesssara, someone else joined Twitter and FetLife as “bbwgoddesssarah” with the only difference being an h at the end of the username. While this was infuriating – because she followed me, so it didn’t seem like coincidence – there was nothing I could do.

One reason it annoyed me is that I know people choose not to read, choose not to do their research. One creator I worked with even fucked up my name and kept writing “Sarah”. Then he was pissy when I asked him to correct it. If this happens to you and the creator refuses to correct it, my petty ass says to misspell their name on your collab content and keep it that way until they fix the issue. You can also just reach out to the site where the content is posted. Sites like ManyVids will typically do something about that.

Back on topic…

Essentially, you don’t want to be confused with another creator.

Types of Content

The type of content you do will help you decide which sites you join.

If you only want to post photos or maybe some short clips, my recommendation is a subscription page. You don’t need a clip site. It’s just an additional site to keep track of. LoyalFans is my personal favorite because of what it offers.

You not only have the subscription page feed – where you can customize price, post for subscribers only or include followers or the public, post behind a paywall for non-subscribers, add audio-only content – but you have a video store and an audio store option.

Most subscription pages offer things like the ability to go live and of course to add a paywall for non-subscribers – meaning they’ll pay per post if they think it’s something they want to see – but I don’t know of another subscription site that offers the video and audio store.

LoyalFans also has a great app that does get consistent updates. The only downside to the app is that, while you can record an audio message for your audio store directly on the website, you can’t even view your audio store on their app.

LoyalFans is a little newer, so their customer base is still growing. Keep that in mind when getting started.

If you decide you want to provide clips – something 5 minutes or longer – I recommend using a clip site. You can, of course, have both a subscription page and a clip site. Or even multiple of each type. Keep in mind that the more sites you have, the more you have to remember to post to. At some point, it may get overwhelming.

As for clip sites, my personal favorite is ManyVids, though I’ve just started using Clips4Sale, which seems to be pretty solid. I’ll do a longer breakdown of all the sites I’ve used and what I like or don’t about each one.

ManyVids does offer a subscription option called the Club, but I’ve never found it to be useful. I get more subscribers on literally any other subscription site I use. They do also allow you to go live, but that’s another tool I haven’t found useful with them. I use them for clips and for a store that houses digital and physical items.

One reason I like ManyVids is that, unlike some clip sites, I can not only provide my own thumbnail, but my own preview. Some sites may allow you to upload one, but not the other. Some sites may have a size limit on any preview upload and if your file is too big, you’ll be forced to use their preview generator which is always crap. Lookin’ at you, iWantClips.

I like the layout of the ManyVids clip and items stores too. It’s easy to see thumbnails or the image for each item, it’s easy to navigate. It’s not perfect, but the clip site itself is incredibly popular among creators and fans so they have a good customer base you can appeal to.

Obviously, take all of my recommendations with a grain of salt. I’m a different creator than you will be.

if all you want to do is provide texting and phone calls, there are sites for that too. NiteFlirt and SextPanther are popular and while that isn’t a big part of what I do, I have found I like SextPanther better – and they have an app. NiteFlirt doesn’t. Any site that has their own app (a good one) is going to take precedence for me, just for ease.

Rules & Guidelines

No matter what site or sites you use, make sure you read the guidelines and terms of service. There will be certain words, kinks, acts, and more that are not allowed. “Force” and “Hypnosis” are no-nos on many sites. OnlyFans doesn’t allow you to use “gangbang” for some reason. SextPanther doesn’t allow “cbt” which stands for cock and ball torture, so if you’re a Domme, be aware of that.

Much of this stems from companies like Visa or MasterCard not wanting to risk being associated with something illegal. So even consensual content including those terms is against the rules.

Most will usually stop you from posting anything with a banned word before you click submit or post, but if it’s in the content itself, your content could be taken down and your account may even be banned.

Be careful!

JOIN!

Now it’s time to join sites and get verified.

Let me be clear – I don’t care how you’re selling content or where, but if you do not have at least one age verified page, I will not interact with you and no one else should be doing so either.

Throne does not count. CashApp does not count. A chat link does not count. I want to see a spicy site. Even if you never post there, having a page on which you can verify that you are over 18 is critical.

Age verification will always require your photo ID – sometimes front and back – as well as a photo of you holding the ID and/or a piece of paper. That paper will usually include your username and maybe the date or the name of the site. These sites will vary on what they require, but it’s all pretty standard stuff, so just be prepared.

Your ID cannot be expired when you do this or it will be rejected.

Just a quick note about age verification – if you film with someone, even if they don’t have their own pages, you will need them to sign a model release form and I also recommend a US 2257 form if you’re US-based.

The latter is a legal form required in the US porn industry, but the model release is required on every site. Some sites will even have their own versions you can use.

You should also take photos of the front and back of the co-performer’s ID as well as a photo of them holding the ID and a photo of them holding the model release next to their face. The latter isn’t usually necessary, but it’s good to have just in case.

Social Media

While you are waiting for that age verification to process – it can take anywhere from a few hours to a few days – join your social media and get set up.

Join Twitter, join Instagram, join TikTok if you want. Make sure you’re careful about what you post because Twitter may not care, but IG and TikTok certainly do. I’ve seen popular Dommes lose their whole account because they got one too many strikes.

Your profile photo and banner (if applicable) should be clear, not grainy or low quality. Don’t use a weird Snapchat filter. I promise you that your fans don’t want that. Try to keep these photos the same or similar across all of your social media so that it’s easier to identify you. This could help if someone creates a persona with a similar name.

Write out a short bio – nothing crazy, just a quick note about who you are. If you’re not sure, take a look at some creators you like and see what they do. Never copy someone’s profile or posts.

You should never use a spicy link as your official link for any of your social media. Set up a linktree or allmylinks page that has all the places your fans can find you. Having your OnlyFans or ManyVids or whatever as the link in your Twitter bio will get you shadowbanned at the very least.

Even if you’re still waiting on age verification, you can add those sites to your linktree/allmylinks because that approval may come through at a random hour and you want to have that link ready to view immediately.

This is also the time to link your social media – really just Twitter as of the writing of this post – to your spicy sites. Set up auto-tweets for when you make a sale on ManyVids or get a new subscriber on LoyalFans. Keep in mind that you will still need to be sure to post organically because too many automated tweets can trigger a shadowban.

Scheduling

One way to stay consistent is to schedule tweets using the desktop version of the Twitter website. I’m not sure how far out you can schedule, but I’ve gone more than 3 months out and scheduled over 100 tweets at a time with no issues.

Because sites like IG and Bluesky don’t have a scheduling option, I also use a site called Buffer to schedule posts. I don’t do this consistently because I just use the free version which only allows me to schedule up to 10 posts at a time per channel and I can only link 3 channels for free. After that, it’s $5/month per channel if you pay annually or $6/month if you pay monthly.

Scheduling posts helps me so much. I find that even when I’m not organically posting as often, I still sell more because I’ve scheduled posts saying “check out my best-selling video for the last 3 years” and or “my Fansly is just $8 for exclusive photos, messaging, and full lenght clips!”

Community

Something you should be doing no matter your persona is connecting with others in the community. I use a few sites to do that and one is FetLife.

I’ll admit it’s not the best – group leaders really let the power go to their heads sometimes and there are tons of issues with posts not being approved and things like that. But it’s a good place to start.

You can get verified there, but last time I checked it required a photo of your face and that photo cannot be made completely private. It has to at least be visible to friends. If you don’t add any friends, you’re all set, but if you don’t want to show your face and you have added friends… just stay unverified.

On FetLife, you can make blog type posts (called Writings), post photos, videos, host events, create groups. There’s a lot you can do there.

If you are a financial Domme and you want to join a group that isn’t specific to findom, make sure the group rules don’t explicitly prohibit findom or you will be removed from that group. I don’t know why people hate on us, but they do and it’s so fucking stupid.

Twitter does have some options as well. Search keywords that have to do with your content. I would search BBW or findom and also search phrases like “engagement group” or “promo” and a variety of things. There are plenty of accounts that are made specifically to help promote adult creators. Some are geared more toward findom or BBWs or a certain type of content, but most will retweet for free.

Engagement groups are also a great way to connect, but I’ll talk more about that in a future post. Essentially, those are groups that will usually require you to follow everyone in the group and then like, comment on, or retweet any “drops” or shared tweets within a certain time period. For example, a few I’m in right now require you to retweet or like or comment on any drops from the last 8 hours before you drop your own posts.

There are also Telegram groups – be careful because it’s easy to get scammed – and Discord servers out there. If you’d like to join my Discord (for models, Dommes, and subs), click here.

As always, take what I’ve said with a grain of salt and feel free to provide feedback on what does and doesn’t work for you. I’d love to hear!